Real cows · real portraits
Every cow is photographed by us, bio’d by us, and — we say this with love — a little spoiled. Find the one who deserves a bouquet today.
dramatic Jersey · 4 yrs
The romantic of the herd. Believes every meal is a special occasion and will pause dramatically before the first bite as if posing for a portrait. Prefers her bouquets soft, floral, and a little bit extra.
content Highland · 7 yrs
Distinguished and shaggy, with strong opinions about hay provenance. Will accept only the finest first-cut timothy and has been known to return an arrangement he finds "pedestrian."
hungry Holstein · 2 yrs
The pure enthusiast. Every bouquet is the best bouquet she has ever received, and she will tell you so with her whole face. Eats with joy and zero discernment.
serene Guernsey · 3 yrs
The quiet observer. Watches the gate for a long moment before approaching, as though weighing whether today is worthy of her attention. It usually is.
regal Brown Swiss · 6 yrs
Old money, older manners. Expects her greens arranged, not scattered, and holds firm opinions about ribbon width. Tips generously in affection.
exuberant Dexter · 1 yr
The smallest of the herd and entirely unbothered by it. Approaches every bouquet at a gallop and finishes it before anyone can photograph her.
tender Belted Galloway · 5 yrs
The sentimental one. Keeps the ribbon long after the greens are gone and has been seen nudging it fondly. Prefers wildflowers with a story.
stoic Hereford · 8 yrs
The elder statesman. Unhurried, unimpressed by trends, and a devoted loyalist to the classic hay bouquet. Will nod once if satisfied. That is the review.
The Herd Leaderboard
Bouquets received, this month’s most-gifted greens, and the herd’s Contentment Index. Buttercup is usually winning. Buttercup is always winning.
This season · per cow
142
111
95
78
72
64
55
26This month
Herd-wide · trailing 12 months
